Funked

A series of unfortunate events from family stress to fully and finally rebounding to being stood up tossed me down the emotional low rabbit hole.  I got in a real funk and was desperate to pull myself out of it.  But, it just wasn't letting me, so rather than fight it I went with it and learned the following important lessons:

1) Sadness is a part of life. I was trying to go a million miles and distract myself from my reality rather than feel sad for a few days.  Sadness is really looked down upon, everyone is always telling us to smile and look at the bright side and somehow it had got me to identifying sadness as a bad thing.  But, it isn't.  It feels terrible but if you let it run its course you will be stronger for it.  

2) Learn what you can.  I learned that extreme positivism is the most irritating way to try and help someone in a funk.  My girlfriends have told me this about the way I am.  One of them said "I just want you to listen and not give me a bunch of solutions." To which I thought she didn't mean it because giving her solutions was helping and helping was caring, etc.  Until on Friday I experienced exactly what they found so irritating.  While stewing in my negativity my dad kept texting me positive life affirmations.  Rather than snap at him I realized while his intentions were the purest they came across as him not listening.  I told him that he had just taught me something valuable. 

3) Things have to change.  I touched on this briefly in my previous post about no longer pursuing men.  But, my change has to be larger than this.  Getting funked was a greater indicator that I needed to really look with in myself and my life and improve all the aspects I didn't see as favorable.  I want to call my grandmother more, drink less wine, never smoke again, not meet men at pubs, save more money, travel more, do more fun activities (like cooking dinner) together with my friends and exercise more.   I realized the only true way to say goodbye for good to the funk was to change my life.  So this is what I am working on. 

See I don't think that you should never get in a funk, but I do think once you feel yourself through it you need to focus on what you have learned and why.  Be honest with yourself.  My funk made me realize I had come out of focus and was making old mistakes again.  Everyone is a work in progress. 

Thanks for reading. XO