Ghosting

Insert loud sigh here.  The worst part about joining the land of the dating is ghosting.  One minute you are chatting away getting to know someone.  Smiling when the text, laughing at their cute flirtations, and the next you are staring at a blank screen…you have been ghosted.  I would think the only worse fate in the world of dating is being cat fished.  Thankfully I have yet to experience the latter.  The following are three reasons why you should never ghost someone.

1) It makes that person feel like sh#t.  Seriously.  All it takes is a two second text that says this "Hey, it was great getting to know you, but I met someone else/don't think we are compatible/am getting back together with my ex/etc."  It literally takes two seconds of your day to lightly reject someone.  And, honestly if you are saying "But they might react badly" then you sir, should not be dating period.  I swear one out of ten times I have used this did I ever have a guy ask why and try and be dramatic, in fact scratch that, it was less than one out of ten.  So this excuse is invalid.  Taking two seconds of your day to say you are not interested is the adult thing to do.  Remember when you were about four and you use to hide from people and your mother would say "Use your words" well don't forget this lesson now that you are all grown up.

2) You're making things worse.  You think by ignoring someone they will magically disappear and all awkwardness associated with them will be gone.  WRONG.  By doing step one all awkwardness is gone (if the person is not the one in a million who makes it dramatic).  Ignoring someone sets you up for future uncomfortable situations.  You now have to be concerned if you run into your rejectee out and about.  And, I am assuming because you are the kind to ghost someone you are also the kind to leave some where if you see your rejectee.  DRAMA.  Save yourself and the other person a whole lot of bullsh#t and just man up.  Send the rejection text and be an adult.

3) It is common courtesy.  At one point in time you were interested in the person you ghosted.  While you may despise them for whatever reason now, perhaps they are too clingy, too drunk, too loud, too not your thing, the truth of the matter is that at one point you looked at that person and were down.  Try and keep this in mind.  That while you grew out of the interest they did not.  They are just like you with their emotions.  We have all been rejected (sadly we have all most likely been ghosted…and a few of you have been cat fished…)  You treat someone poorly because you feel poorly about rejecting them.  Try and remember that you too were interested and that you too have been rejected and act from that rather than from a thoughtless background.

Ghosting is the worst.  Try and be sensitive towards the fact that we are all people looking for a connection to someone else.  We are all searching for someone or something in life that makes us happy.  Try and remember that we all have been rejected and the things that hurt you the most.  You can probably guess from this post that Shirtless Matt is a ghost.  But, any person who accepts ghosting as an acceptable form of rejection is not my cup of tea.  Thanks for reading! XO