Dating - You're Doing It Wrong

Remember when dating use to be fun? When you went on a date for the pure and simple reason of going on a date?  When you had casual sex because it feels amazing?  When you tried a new restaurant with a stranger and it was a fun night? We somehow with age have forgotten dating culture.  It became all about the strings attached.  We somehow can't even have a glass of wine with a person of interest without questioning if he didn't want a relationship, marriage, kids and the white picket fence then why did he waste my time and that is absurd.  The following are three reasons you should stop forcing the strings and enjoy your love life 

1) It is never a waste of time. Somehow in our thirties we see dates as wastes of time if they don't lead anywhere.  The truth is you probably had a laugh, a free meal, an awkward kiss maybe even.  You had a date. You shared a moment in time with another human being who wanted that with you.   This is never a waste of anything.

2) You want different things in the future. Ya, great.   But guess what? This isn't the future.  This is the right here and the right now.  Another truth: you could spend a year making awesome memories with another human being (or multiple humans) before you meet your Mr. Right.  Or you could spend that time sulking around, crying over how no man wants to put a ring on it right away.  I don't know about you but I far prefer the former.  Stop. Trying. To. Live. For.  The. Future.  Take a chance on having a good time.

3) Stop forcing the issue.  If you have to chase anyone they aren't interested.  I see so many women putting in all their efforts and then upset when the man backs away.  I get it, you want to show how much you can give but you are killing dating culture.  Go with the flo and stop trying to control your love interest if he is interested he will come around, if not move on gracefully.

Dating should be a blast.  It should be full of awkward moments and strange nights out and laughable stories. It should be light hearted and wonderful.  Have fun with it. If you are meant to meet Mr. Right you will, but until then quit looking in wide eyed wonder at every man like he might be him.  Try viewing them as Mr. Rightnow and go from there.  Thanks for reading!! XO

Single and Fabulous

It took 1597 kms, margaritas and a tattooed man ten years younger than me to say it for me to finally realize I worry too much.  And for what? I was worrying about people judging me for not having a successful relationship at my age, for not being married, for being childless, for not owning my own place...etc.  Then suddenly as I looked into his gorgeous blue eyes as he said "Don't worry about it" I finally realized I needed to stop worrying so much. The following are three reasons I am not worrying anymore about being single:

1) It is a lot of fun.  You know what I love?  Doing what I want, when I want to.  I can stay out all night, or veg out Netflixing the day away and no one is the wiser.   I can book a vacation and go.  I can try a new restaraunt and eat whatever I want.  Single is freedom and it is so much fun. I see so many unhappily coupled people trying desperately to appease on another and I am very happy to be on my own.  I previously blogged about breakfast choices, but from now on I will order two damn breakfasts, because who cares!

2) It's raining men, hallelujah!! I once got four numbers in one night, club hopping and one of them was on my short walk from the club to the Seabus.  Men are so wonderful aren't they? In their dress shoes, with their muscular arms and smelling so fresh.  I love them. Their flirtations are so confidence boosting.  The more men that smile and adore you the better you begin to feel.  They have a way of making you smile that only a cute face can do.

3) Girls, girls, girls.  You know what I miss? All my girlfriends that have forgotten me because they went skipping hang in hand into love and married life with their man.  But!! I now have all the time in world to be with my people. Other fabulous single ladies!! It is so awesome to spend quality time with my ladies as they compliment you and agree without judgement that your fabulous single life is just that, fabulous!

At the end of the day I am so much happier and fit with a clean house when I am single. When people tell me not to worry because I will meet someone.  I laugh and say hopefully not! Relationships are not for me. It took all this time for me to finally realize that is totally okay.  I am done chasing an expectation for myself, from now on I am just going to enjoy who I am.  Fabulous and single.  Thanks for reading! XO

Viva Las Vegas

Wow, Vegas is a wild city!! It brings out your your wild child while encouraging more!! It is so much fun, if I didn't feel like a pile of death by too much fun I would want to go back. The following are three reasons you should go to Vegas now:

1) Time doesn't matter.  And, suddenly you realize it is 4 am but the bartender is fresh and friendly and the booze is still flooding.  You wonder what happened to last call and why are so many people still out and about.  Vegas is a place where you can eat breakfast any time of the day and bottomless mimosas are encouraged at 7 am brunch.  It is NEVER too early or too late for anything, it is always the right time because your on Vegas time!

2) Vegas has everything!! Wether you want to cozy up to a sexy young thing on the strip, dance, see celebrities, catch a show, etc.  Vegas has it all.  Something for everyone.  Above is me sitting at the pool on day one.  Enjoying a refreshing drink and glorious sunshine. My trip varied from this to hot mess express to a road trip to the Grand Canyon and so much more.  If you want it, Vegas has it.  Just go there.

3) Rules? What are those??  While I understand Sinatra sang that New York was the city, I have to argue Vegas is. There is no judgement in Vegas.  With this you find your cares melt away.  Typically in my own city when a man ten years younger than you wants to buy you a shot you laugh and tell him your age...not in Vegas.  Vegas reminds us to stay fun, to stay wild and most of all to let go and not judge.

I may be back in Canada but Vegas will always have my heart. Thanks for reading. XO

Lesson Learned

Well, well, back to being blissfully single and a bit pissed to be honest.  I am not sure why it is right when I consider giving it my all and dating only one man that he turns out to be sh#t.  But, I suppose when the timing is right, so will the man.  The following are three things I have learned about my failure in love this round. 

1) Womanizers are not for me.  At first you feel special because your womanizing man chooses you over all the women he clearly fancies.  You feel like a unique snowflake.  You feel special, but the truth is you can't change an old dog.  He is still going to be interested in putting his nose to every new piece of ass he sees.  Regardless if some of those pieces are your friends or nemesis, which will break you. 

2) Date what you want.  Don't date someone you wish was a little different. A little nicer.  I have always wanted some one who tells me I am beautiful and compliments me.  I want someone who sends flowers and has a heart but you are always wishful that your love interest will be what you want.  Sadly, they are not always what we hope for. I would hope for someone who has built a real career, owns his own place, has good credit (at least a credit card) and has life figured out at 40 but Mr. M is far from attaining any of these admirable qualities.  Where did my standards go when I was interested in this dud? 

3) Be brave and strong.  Never waiver on how people can treat you.  It was right around the time when Mr. M told me about a hot girl hitting on him at the strip club and friending one of my girlfriend's on Facebook (after saying how hot she was) I hung up on him.  Men should not intentionally try and make you jealous or play games or whatever.  

Right when I was thinking things would be great with Mr. M and that he was worth my time he changed my mind.  Between his trash talking my exes and insinuating all my past lovers were nothing compared to him and talking about all the women in his life I realized I am worth so much more than his sh#t.  I hung up on him.  To which he text ended things with me and never talked to me again, I think I can honestly write that he is the biggest douche I have ever spent time with up to date.   As is my amazing pattern I am off to Vegas for three nights of relaxing poolside.  Viva las Vegas!!