I have began to discover that one must get completely fed up with something before they truly create change. Dating for example has proven to be one disappointment after the next in a series of men that I probably should have never given the time of day to in the beginning but I was hopeful and a bit lonely. Frustration paired with a sense of worth creates change. A complete overwhelming urge that "Yes, I deserve to feel amazing about myself and the people I surround myself with." On Friday evening I had an epiphany. It was not how to fulfill my life with the "right" kind of man, or how to meet said man…in fact it had absolutely NOTHING to do with the opposite sex at all. It had everything to do with empowering myself through increasing the amount of time spent in contact with my amazing girlfriends. The following are three reasons why the badass b#tches in my life make me feel like the bomb.
1) No hidden motives. I was having brunch with my girlfriend on Sunday morning and she actually enlightened me to this point. Girlfriends (on average) don't have any ulterior motive to seeing you. They don't want to get you drunk and take advantage of you, they don't want to hit on you and make you feel uncomfortable, they don't want to send you hammer pics and make you feel worthless. No. On the contrary female friends actually want to see you. Their only motive behind calling you is that they need to chat to you. Their only motive behind wanting to drink wine with you is that they enjoy your company paired with a cab sauv. Their only motive behind paying for lunch is that they want to treat you. Strong female friends have an incredible way of reminding us of our worth and how people should treat each other.
2) They compliment you. Women have an uncanny ability to build each other up. At this point in your life I assume you have out grown any kind of woman who tears others down. Surround yourself with women who make you feel beautiful and loved. When I see my girlfriends they always say "Oh you look so great!" or they compliment your nail polish or hair and they mean it. And they mean it because they want you to feel beautiful and they like certain things about you. They don't compliment you because they have to. They don't say frivolous things to you that they do not mean. They actually like you and what you do, what you wear, your hair, your everything and that is something very special in this world. To have people in your life who truly see you, all your sides and all of you and still pick out small things about you which are beautiful to them. If you have women similar to this in your life cherish them and let them know because these relationships are far more rewarding than any other.
3) They need you too. Have you ever got the 3 am phone call from your distraught girlfriend who is crying and thought what the hell? Only to console her and eventually go back to sleep? At first these panicked moments appear dramatic but then you must come to realize of all the people in all the world your friend chose you to lean on. That is amazing. Of all the contacts in her phone and of all the people she reached out to you because you are a good friend. You are needed. You are the one that friends want to book lunches with and drinks with and you are the one that gets birthday wishes and thoughtful gifts. You are needed in your circle of friends. Often relationships with the opposite sex leave us questioning what the hell is going on and why. But, you always know with your fabulous female friends that you are truly appreciated and needed.
So long men and dating (aka bullsh#t and stress paired with drama) and hello happiness.
The less I talked to men. The better I felt about myself. The less I worried about dates with men and the more I focused on my lady dates the more self worth I have. Sometimes in life you need to lose yourself in great friendships and forget everything else. Thanks for reading!
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