Wednesday 1 June 2016

I am not sorry


I recently had a cute interaction with a man from a long history, we will call him "Shirtless Matt" the conversation went like this:
Me: Hey Shirtless Matt, this is Victoria...
Shirtless Matt: Hey Victoria, sorry this is Shirtless Matt...
To which he shortly after said he didn't mean sorry.  But, this interaction made me really think about how often I hear sorry and how more often than not it is not necessary.  The following are three examples.

1) We apologize for no reason.  Beyond the cute example above; my girlfriend Ms.M apologizes on Sunday after we hang out.  She says "Sorry we didn't do anything fun." As if spending the day with my best gal is not fun? Seriously??? What are we apologizing for and why??  We need to ask ourselves this and stop apologizing. We need to stop throwing around apologies because the word "sorry" means something and it doesn't always apply.

2) It is not rude to not apologize.  The other day at work my coworker and I reached for the coffee at the same time.  Rather than say "Please, you go first." They apologized.  To which I insisted there was nothing to be sorry for and told them to go first.  Being polite doesn't always mean saying sorry. Apologies have a time and place and we misuse them in instances that actually require other manners.  Using "sorry" has become a generic word that we have began to apply to a wide variety of interactions.

3) Sincerity. If we are constantly apologizing how are we to know when it means something.  Of course you should apologize when we have hurt someone, but when we reach for the same apple at the grocery store warrants the same action as hitting someone's car, one has to question what we are doing.  There are too many amazing words and lines to use for socializing and I say we tone down the apologies.  Rather than sorry over an apple, why not pick a good apple and hand it to the person next to you telling them it is a good one.

Don't get me wrong. Don't be an as#hole and never apologize. I am saying use it when you mean it.  Sorry is a word that means so much and yet has been spoken so often that it really has become meaningless.  We hear it so often we have new societal pressure to prove "sorry" because the word is not enough and this is a whole other topic.
Oh, and as for Shirtless Matt? Well you will have to stay tuned.  Thanks for reading! XO

No comments:

Post a Comment